OricXe - Column for 10/6

I saw her the first day of high school. She was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. She was standing across the hall from me, oblivious to the eyes that were absolutely entranced by the perfection of her. You see, I was not one of the most eye-catching people there were. We were not in the same class, nor did we get any classes together, so I didn't really see her that much after that non-encounter.


A few grades later we ended up in the same class. I was older and better looking and so had she. I knew that she was the girl I saw as I had not seen her in a long time. I still thought that she was beautiful, but I did not really feel as astounded by her as I felt the first time. You know that I am quite a shy guy, so I never approached her for half of the year and when I did, it was not about what anything remotely related to the stuff that you are thinking about. I did not really feel much more than a passable lust for her, you see.


So, after lots and lots of one or two sentence conversations in the vein of, "Will you lend your rubber to me please?"

"Sure, there you are." We started insulting each other. Not insults to make one hurt or feel bad about oneself, but something to make us laugh. I got most of it obviously.


We continued for a long time, started having real conversations. We once had those moments you see in movies where you say something~EI can't really explain it in one sentence so I'll dedicate three lines to it.


I can't remember how it happened. We were looking at each other. She said something, I moved my face closer. I have no idea what she said. Then I said something and she moved in closer. It went on like that for a few times, both of us daring each other to move in closer. We were about two sentences away from kissing when my friend, who had been watching since we were in class and the teacher was busy with some other stuff and not paying any attention to us, said "C'mon I dare you to kiss!" and the moment was lost.


OK that was five lines, I don't care. I realized a few months later(You know that I'm quite slow) that I was deeply in love with this girl. After analyzing that situation I knew that she felt the same way about me too. She was so different from other girls. She didn't understand me and I didn't really understand her. We were different from each other. She was not quite the person I thought my dream girl would be like. Her personality was quite different from what you would expect from someone so beautiful.


I found the courage to tell her how I hated thinking 'bout her all day, how I hated the way I sometimes smiled when I looked at her and how I once spent a whole period looking at her hand. She said she felt the same way although the hand thing was kind of creepy.


We hooked up.


God! I had never been so happy in my life. I saw her everyday, but never grew tired. I loved her.


But now she's gone. Last week someone broke into their house and killed her. I found the guys and killed them too. This brings me to why I'm writing you this letter OricXe, my dear friend. You should have been at my funeral by now. I just can't live without her anymore. The pills were under my bed in case you were wondering where I left the bottle.


This is a letter I received from Egor. I just thought that I should mention him. He didn't die of a drug overdose. He died when a truck hit him a day before the day he was supposed to commit suicide.

Columns by OricXe