Boy: Hey Shauna, how long have you been with the company?
Girl: Well, I joined in August of 2000, so about five years.
B: Five years. That's practically a lifetime in this company.
G: Yeah. You joined, what, like in '99? 98?
B: Actually, '97. October of '97.
G: Wow. Eight years. So, like, what's your employee number?
B: Who knows? Maybe six or something. We used to keep track of that sort of stuff years ago, but it just doesn't seem that important these days.
G: Five years working around each other and this is the first time we're in a plane together. How does that happen?
B: You and I pretty much do different work. We're in different departments. It's just random chance that they're setting up a new office in Helsinki.
G: Yeah. I guess you're right.
B: But it's funny you mention it. I've been with the company eight years, but the last five have been the longest.
G: What do you mean?
B: I mean now that we're on this flight, I can tell you something I've wanted to tell you for five years.
G: Dude, you're freaking me out.
B: Don't worry. I just wanted to let you know that you have the most absolutely amazing ass.
G: Are you fucking drunk?
B: Nope. Stone-cold sober. I had a light beer with my meal, but...
G: Are you seriously telling me this?
B: Yes. You have an amazing ass.
G: I can't believe this. I'm stuck on a plane for the next ten hours. We're in the same fucking hotel. I'm changing hotels.
B: That's OK. I'm sorry you're so distressed.
G: Well what the fuck did you expect? I mean, you're married for fuck's sake!
B: Yes, but there's no way you'd let me into your pants...
G: You got that right!
B: ...and there's no way I'd be unfaithful to my wife.
G: Can't you be arrested for this? I mean, I should sue you or something.
B: Maybe. Definitely fired if you lodge a complaint with HR, but I'm OK with that.
G: Who does this? Nobody just does this.
B: Yes. It is silly, isn't it? If I compliment you on your new hairstyle or your jacket, that's no problem, but if I mention that you have the most shapely, athletic, perky, and tantalizingly mobile behind I've ever laid eyes on, that's crossing the line.
G: You are... I... uh... excuse me, sir? Sir? Would you mind changing seats with me?
Other passenger: No chance, lady. That guy's a freak.
G: Shit.
B: We can stop talking about it if you want.
G: What the hell are you thinking? I mean, you're married. You have a daughter.
B: If it's any comfort, I wouldn't be after you even if I were single.
G: Oh man...
B: Well, you've admitted it yourself. You always go for the wrong kind of guy. You've had more than a couple of office romances do really badly. You've told me all about it.
G: Look, you don't have to be a complete asshole.
B: You've got a lot to offer. One of these days, soon, some guy is going to come along and see the intelligence and creativity and lust for life and he's going to fall head over heels.
G: That's what I keep thinking.
B: Well you're not going to find anyone like that at work. Too many assholes hanging around there.
G: You said it.
B: At least I'm not trying to bed you.
G: You are such a perv!
B: You should take up sailboarding again. Or get back into that wilderness EMT thing again. I never saw you happier than when you were doing that.
G: Yeah, but who has the time? I mean, we're on a plane to frickin' Finland.
B: Maybe you can sailboard in Finland.
G: In February?
B: Maybe sail... skate?
G: You are a total freak.
B: The point is, if you just keep making excuses, that's all you be left with.
G: Yeah.
B: I've learned to be a carpe diem sort of guy.
G: No. Really?
B: What do you say I buy you a beer or two and we call it even?
G: Oh, you mean, don't bother to file a sexual harassment complaint and then drop my civil case and not call your wife? For a couple of beers?
B: That'd be cool. I'd appreciate it.
G: You are such a freak.
Pakeha