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Ok, I've been on a diet for the last couple months, and so far I've managed to lose over 35 pounds, so all told, it's been going pretty well.
This particular diet is one of those low-carbohydrate diets, complete with a nutritionist/dietician I visit a couple times a week. Unlike many of the wacky diets, like the carnivore ones, or the absolutely no carb diets, I'm supposed to have four or more helpings of healthy carbs every day in small doses. "Healthy carbs" in this case are those are found in things with lots of fiber, and with complex carbohydrates... that sort of thing. So, of course, since there are so many carbs that are verboten in this new diet one of the things that's had a slow boil in the back of my mind is what things I miss most. So for no reason besides iterating through them is my list of the top eight things I'd want to eat if I weren't on my diet. Now, keep in mind that when I'm picturing these things, I'm picturing the very best of these things, not your fast food or grocery store versions of these products. 8) Beer – I'm not supposed to have any alcohol on the diet, not so much because it's calorie rich (because there are some alcohols that aren't that bad), but because it usually undermines any resolve I would have to resisting other, far more tempting foods. As for why beer was the only alcohol you find on this list... frankly drinking just doesn't have that much an appeal for me. There are times, after an exhausting day, that a drink really hits the spot... and there's a certainly pleasure in sharing a beer with a group of friends... but had I my druthers, I'd rather any of the following seven rather than have a beer. 7) Ice Cream – Now again, I'm talking about some really good designer ice cream here. One of those five dollar a pint versions which comes with all sorts of epicurean ingredients and with more cream than a cat would know what to do with. 6) Cheese – Actually, this is one of those foods that I could even accept a selection from the local grocery store. I nice extra sharp cheddar to go with my lean turkey chili, or just some toasted brie, or frankly any really nice cheese. 5) Chocolate – A truffle, a nice chocolate bar, some thick chocolate coco... heck, even a handful of chocolate chips (the good ones). 4) Waffle – A nice Belgian waffle, or something homemade with a pad of butter melting across it. Just, for heaven sake, don't pollute it with any syrup – I don't understand people who employ syrup, it's like they're members of the Manson family or something. How could you? It was blessed, and then you added syrup, and it now has to be thrown away. Ick. If I couldn't find a waffle, I'd also settle for a croissant or something light and flakey and somewhere between bread and pastry. 3) Shortbread – oh, man, I have such a weakness for shortbread. If left alone with a cupboard full of shortbread I'd gain those 35 pounds back in a week. 2) Chips and Salsa/Guacamole – Now, this is tricky, because I'm actually allowed both Salsa and Guacamole on my current diet. I'm not supposed to have more than a third of an avocado's worth of guacamole (some fat's ok on the diet, just not too much), and I'm supposed to really watch how much sodium I take in, but provided the salsa/guacamole falls within those guidelines, I'm fine. That being said, I miss the one perfect delivery method for those two blessed foods... which is the perfect flour tortilla chip. 1) Brownie – Now, even when not dieting, I can't have too many of these before going into a hypoglycemic shock... but you take a master browniecrafter, someone who knows that the perfect brownie contains no nuts, and even more chocolate than Hercule Poirot could handle. Oh... now, just one, only one of those... that would hit the spot right about now. |